![]() I don’t want to stand around and watch the senior performances. I leave Dex, Fiona and Jae staring after me in confusion, but I don’t care, and I don’t slow down. I manage a nod and mumble, “I need to use the ladies’ room. Her words don’t ease the tight ache in my chest. ![]() “That was spectacular,” a voice bursts out, and I turn to see Fiona marching toward me. I touch my cheek, surprised to feel moisture there. It’s Dexter, and his smile takes up his entire face as he congratulates me. Jae and I leave the stage and head for the wings, and someone instantly swallows me in a bear hug. Contrary to what movies and television shows lead you to believe, it’s impossible to make eye contact with a face in the crowd when a blast of light is hitting you in the eyes. I know Allie and Stella and Meg are out there somewhere, on their feet and screaming their lungs out, but I can’t see their faces. The spotlight blinds me and the cheers deafen me. I rise to my feet, and only because Jae walks over and forces me to so we can take a bow. When I’m done, silence crashes over the auditorium. My fingers tremble on the ivory keys and my heart squeezes with every breath I take, every word I sing. Where girls don’t get raped and sex isn’t hard and people don’t break up because abusive assholes force them to. ![]() I’m transported to that peaceful place, my happy little bubble where nothing bad ever happens. When I open my mouth and start to sing, I’m singing it for Garrett. ![]()
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